Two

Well. I have two things to share. The first is much more pleasant compared to the second, so I'll start with that.

We're throwing a bridal shower for my roommate, Jessica, today. I'm excited but a little sad at the same time. This shower kinda symbolizes the "breakup" of us as roommates. Jess is getting married, Amanda's staying in Liberty Square and then moving to a house in the fall, Kate's graduating. Only Lindsay and I will be living together this spring. I feel like I've lived with these girls forever, and I've felt that way for nearly the entire past two years. But at least this spring it'll be somewhat easy to keep in touch. We'll live pretty close to each other until the end of June. After that, I really hope that we can continue to be such good friends, despite the parting of our ways.

The shower should be pretty fun tonight though. We refused to tell Jessica anything about the plans for the shower. She's kinda stressed out by that and it's pretty funny.

Ok, on to the not pleasant thing.

About three weeks ago, I finally broke down (due to some encouragement from Lindsay) and went to the counseling center to set up an appointment to see a counselor. A week ago today, I went to my appointment. It was an intake appointment, where they just talk to you and figure out how to treat you. Well, the counselor I saw diagnosed me (is diagnosed the right word to use?) with moderate depression. So I'm going to have counseling this spring and this coming Monday, I'm going to see a psychiatrist to maybe prescribe some medication for me.

I feel weird posting this on a blog instead of telling people in person or over the phone or whatnot. But I know that if I tried to tell people those ways, I'd pretty much break into tears and get embarrassingly emotional. It was hard enough just talking about it at my intake interview.

So that's the unpleasant news. I kinda feel relieved. I don't feel like now that I'm gonna see a counselor and take medication that all my problems will just go away; I know that it's most likely gonna get harder now that I have to actually deal with everything instead of just shoving it deeper inside me. But I feel a great sense of relief that I've started something to get help. It's like there's an end in sight finally. Right now it feels an incredible, impossible distance away, but at least I can catch a glimpse of it. And that's a very relieving thought.