Finals

I only have 2 left now! And I just finished studying for one of them. Yes, I'm taking a quick mental breath of air before I go take it. And afterwards, there will be only one final left for the redhead. I'm pretty happy about the other final I took today. 93, baby! And though I don't know what I got on the one I took Saturday, I do feel pretty good about it. So, here's hoping I do as well on the two that are left. Wish me luck!

Date

I just got back from my date. It was pretty fun. And not awkward.

So, we (Jamie, Merrill, me and Tim) went up to Salt Lake to see the lights on Temple Square. They were very pretty and of course, the temple was gorgeous. We walked around for a bit; they had all these nativity scenes and luminaries with different Christmasy words in different languages. Tim had to find the one with Norwegian on it, so I helped him find it. Then he explained to me the difference between the Norwegian and the Danish word. He's so funny. So after we walked around for like, an hour, we went to the Pie for pizza. The Pie is this little pizza joint near the University of Utah with pretty good pizza. Tim and I split a chicken alfredo pizza. It was somewhat odd eating a pizza with broccoli on it, but it tasted pretty darn good. I bet that broccoli-flavored ice cream wouldn't taste so good as that pizza. Anyhoo, that was the date. Tim and I got along pretty well, I think. I totally wouldn't mind going out with him again. But I think he should ask me next time. That way, I can get chocolate cake.

Cynicism

I hate dates. They're horrible, stressful, sleep-depriving, awkward things that make you worry even before you actually ask the other person. And the only time they're fun is when you hear about them from other people. Do I sound bitter and cynical? Well, I am. I've decided to never like another boy again. I'll go live in a nunnery in Prague. That sounds so much better than living with the realization that boys just don't like me. They've never liked me and they never will. I guess I'm just not attractive.

The truth is, I'm scared to death of boys. Always have been. And asking one out scares the pants off me. I just want to crawl into a deep hole and stay there forever. Where there aren't any boys.

Cougars

I really just have one topic today.

WE BEAT UTAH! BYU IS SOOOOOO AWESOME! I LOVE THE COUGARS!

The best part was the winning play John Beck made with 3 seconds left in the game. Sweetest game ever.

News

I might have a new boy. Nothing real certain yet; I don't know if I even like the boy for sure. We'll see.

Rocks

Well, I did just about the coolest thing ever this weekend. Jamie, Amanda and I went down to Moab on Friday night. We walked around the little shops downtown for a bit, went to dinner, then we headed back to our hotel where we went down to the hot tub then back up to our room. The next day was the fun day though. We drove to Arches National Park and just climbed around on rocks the whole day. So fun! I'll try to get some pictures up later. I'm pretty sore right now. I realized something from that experience, though. I have trust issues. Yup. Climbing all around like we did, I was trying to do everything myself. But there were a couple rocks I couldn't get up by myself, and when Jamie and Amanda tried to help me, I didn't trust them completely. It may sound kinda stupid, but that realization struck me hard. I don't trust people. Ok, maybe I trust them a little, but I don't think I've ever trusted anyone utterly and completely. Kinda a scary thought.

Dream

I had the weirdest dream last night. Seriously, I woke up and thought to myself, what the heck brought that on? Why on earth would I dream about that guy? I don't even really know him. Much less have the kind of interest in him that apparently I had in my dream. I'm not gonna mention names, because I never know who might be reading this, but I have recently mentioned him in a previous post. Really, really bizarre. Maybe my subconscious is secretly really attracted to him though. Even though I think I'm taller than he is. Go figure.

In conclusion, dreams are really random sometimes.

gmail

You know how with gmail, there are those little advertisements on the side that relate to keywords in your email? Those are funny sometimes. Like today when I looked at the comment that Peter put on my last post, the advertisements were all for belly dancing costumes and belly dancing music and learn how to belly dance videos. I laughed.

Shimmy

So Divine Comedy's this weekend. I'm thinking I'm gonna go cause it's funny and stuff and I'm pretty tight with Joel, who's in it. By pretty tight, of course I mean that we exchange greetings whenever I enter the library and he's working at the security desk. I think we had a conversation that lasted about a minute once. Well, anyhoo, he's cool. And now, I really have to go cause of this interesting thing that happened. I was walking into the bookstore and these D.C. (Divine Comedy) people were sitting at a bench passing out flyers and such. They asked if I wanted one and I said sure, I kinda wanted to go, actually. So one of the guys there was like, if I shimmy for you, will you change that to a definite I want to go? I said sure. So he shimmied for me. It was quite amusing and this other guy walking by took another flyer just because of the shimmying. So I texted Lindsay to see if she wanted to go and now we're making plans. Yay!

Week

So I finally got my phone situation all figured out and settled. I feel properly connected to the world again. And I passed off my Middle English memorized lines this week, doing fabulously on them, I might add. Didn't go on any dates, don't have any planned, but I did work on flirting with Parker today at work. That boy. He's just too cute. Drives me nuts.

That leaves me with laundry that needs to be done, a HEPE test to take, and CHum homework to do.

I love the rather damp fall weather we've been having. I feel so at home! Mmm, I love the fall. Especially since I bought two candles the other day at the store for my candle warmer. Pumpkin spice and Caramel Apple. Such delicious autumn flavors!

Roommate

This is my roommate! Cool, huh?

Events

I am now officially an aunt! Check out my sister's blog and my mom's blog for pictures!

I also went out on a date tonight. With a genuine Southern gentleman. It was great! My coworker, Brittany set us up and we doubled with her and her boyfriend. First we went bowling, then to Subway for some subs, then back to the guys' place to watch a bit of Harry Potter 4, and last we played Loaded Questions. I was kinda nervous about it being awkward, but Matt turned out really fun. I'd go out with him again. Unfortunately, he's just visiting his brother this week and then he'll go back to Georgia. He asked if he could call me if he came back into town though. I said yes.

Phone

I bought a new phone! Well, a used phone, but new for me.
Check it out!

It's a LC C1300 phone. Pretty basic, yes. Not as cute as my old phone, yes. I can deal, though. Hopefully, next July I'll be able to get a new phone from my plan. I was actually looking at a Motorola one and almost bought that, but someone beat me to it at the last second. Bummer. At least I'll have a phone.

Phone

Today I feel very idiotic.

I ran my cell phone through the wash. It was an accident, of course, but that doesn't make me feel any better. When I called Mom and told her, she just laughed. I guess it is kinda funny. But sad, too. Now my faithful phone has gone to that big Cingular service provider in the sky. I will have to move on to another phone. In the meantime, I'll be phoneless for a couple days. But I lived for 20 years without a cell phone; I can survive a few days without one. I hope.

Cold

We've been having pretty chilly weather here in Utah. And unfortunately, I have a cold, too. My head is all stuffy and my nose is all drippy and I just feel cruddy. It's not really severe or anything, just uncomfortable. I have to blow my nose a lot. That kinda gets gross and also tiresome, especially since today I apparently blew hard enough to burst a blood vessel and got a nosebleed. Right when I was supposed to go to class. Ugh. I hate being sick.

I'm really excited about being an aunt sometime soon, though. Hopefully, any day now, little Lindsay will just pop out!

Roommate

I had a room-roommate for a week and two days. Then she moved out. Apparently for some family/personal reason. It was quite strange, actually. I got home from work on Thursday, and my room was half empty. Just that morning, all Brittany's stuff was there. Fortunately, it wasn't because we smelled or were mean. She stopped by later and reassured us. But I'm roommate-less again.

I'm actually not that distraught about having my own room for right now. It's pretty nice. Who knows when or even if we're getting another girl? But I'll enjoy having lots of space in the meantime.

Soap

I bought some today. Hand soap. At the dollar store. Let me lead up to that, though.

Wednesday's are relatively busy days. I have three classes; I'm done with them at 4 o'clock. Then I work from 4 to 6. At work today, I finally got trained as a Team Leader, which means I can get a raise! Yay! Especially cause I've been a TL de facto for 2 and a half weeks.

After I got home from work, Lindsay and I went to rescue Jessica and her husband, Scott. They had locked themselves out of their car while the car was still running. Lindsay knows how to break into a car; so while she and Scott got the car unlocked, Jessica and I had a short little chat. Jessica and I haven't gotten to do that for awhile, so it was nice. Then after that, Scott and Jessica took us out for pizza to thank us for helping them out. I certainly didn't do much to help, but it was fun anyways. Good pizza, too. Yay for pizza!

That brings us to the dollar store. We needed scrub thingies and hand soap for the apartment, so we each bought one of each. Yay for the dollar store! For our last errand, we went to the Smith Fieldhouse and walked for about 30 minutes. I'm working on getting into shape and having Lindsay do it with me is like having my own personal trainer. Yay for Lindsay! Working out is so much more enjoyable with someone else there beside you. I felt great afterwards.

When we got back to the apartment, Merrill was there with Jamie. He's our home teacher and had promised to make us cookies a while ago. And he had cookies for us tonight! Yay for cookies!

Tomorrow promises to be another busy day. I have class and work and Lindsay and I have to go on a walk. But then it will be Friday and the weekend. Yay for the weekend!

Agreed

quote of the day:
You really can't have a good storytime if there isn't any kissing.

Conference

We had a regional conference thingy today for church and it was awesome! First President Samuelson spoke, then Joseph B. Wirthlin, and then President Monson! It was broadcast from the Marriott center on campus, but the roomies and I went to the Fine Arts center to watch it from the De Jong concert hall.

I think this was the best conference I've ever been to. President Monson gave a totally phenomenal talk. It was interesting and funny and incredibly spiritual. He was so much more animated than he is in General Conference. He talked about lots of things, but mostly about making a blueprint for our lives, by having a house of learning, house of glory, house of order, etc. This was one of those talks that makes you want to go out and take action afterwards, those talks that get you really excited about the gospel. It was amazing! So, hopefully this week will be great, and I'll do good stuff.

School

First day back in school. Well, it didn't really feel very schoolish, cause I only have one class on Tuesdays. I went to work at 9, ate lunch a little after 11, hung around campus, went to my interior design class, which looks like fun, bought the book for interior design (along with the packet for the class, a binder, and some notebook paper), then came home. Our apartment manager called to tell us that the 4th girl should be moving in today at 5:30. That's in a hour, roughly. I hope she's nice.

Oooo, and I get to be a kind of mentor to Parker, the Italian poetry-reading guy, because all the new people at work get a mentor. Points for my boss for assigning me to him!

Holiday

I woke up at 7:45 in the morning today. How awful is that? Today is the last day before school starts and I don't even get to sleep in. Anyway, the reason I woke up so early is so I could go to Walmart with the Roberts. I bought some stuff, including pillows. Ah, there's nothing like new fluffy pillows.

When I got home I got started on cleaning up my room. I did some laundry, put all my clothes away, and did a little bit of organizing. I still have some more to do, but my room looks much better now.

Jamie's friend, Merrill, invited us to go boating on Deer Creek Lake on his friend's boat. That was way fun, speeding around the lake, the wind rushing through my hair. It felt great and the mountains were gorgeous!

I think I spent my Labor Day pretty well, all things considered. And I still get to look forward to going to IHOP tonight!

Antitheses

Nice thing that happened today:

Parker, a new guy at work, read me Italian poetry while we did book processing. There's nothing like having a cute guy speak Italian to you!

Creepy thing that happened today:

On the way home from work, this weird Latino guy pulls up in a car and I swear, starts hitting on me. It was creepy. Really, really creepy. So much so that when I got home I locked the door, with both the handle and the deadbolt.

Premiere

Last night I went to Lindsay's movie premiere. It wasn't a big movie or anything, just a short 3o minute film about this kid trying to decide if he wants to make a bunch of money or go on a mission (called Money or Mission). Lindsay was the love interest. It was kinda weird watching my best friend in a movie, but it was fun watching her sign movie posters afterwards with other people from the cast. I got her to sign one for me, of course, and I was like, Oh my gosh, it's Lindsay Bird, will you sign my poster, please! She's a really good PR person. I got the director, John Lyde, to sign the poster, too. He's way cool. Good director. Definitely going places. And I'm on a first name basis with him. Just cause of Lindsay.

Starstruck

Ok, please bear with me while I be a fangirl.

I MET SEAN ASTIN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

So, tonight was pretty much the best night ever! I got to go to the movie set where Sean Astin was filming and watch him and meet him and take a picture with him and when he walked by the first time I smiled at him and he smiled back!

It was really cool being on the set and actually getting to watch him in action. He was real intense and focused when doing his stuff. We were standing right outside the room where he was doing a scene, so when I see the movie, I can say if the door behind Sean was open, you could almost see me! He was really nice to us when we asked him for pictures; we had to wait a while for him to finally have time to do it, though. And when we did, he said, "Raise your hand if you're Mormon." We all did (we being Lindsay, Jamie, Jordelle, Eva<--a friend of Jordelle, and me). Then he told us that someone had just given him a Book of Mormon, so when we took the picture, he held it up. He was so cool.

Pretty much the coolest sweetest thing that's ever happened to me!

Lindsay, Me, Jordelle, Sean Astin, Jamie, and Eva

Me and Sean
(I got to hug Sam!)

Weekend

So, I had a pretty exciting weekend.

First, I moved back to Provo. That was somewhat eventful. Friday morning I got on a plane, flew to Dallas, got on another plane, threw up twice, and got off the plane in Salt Lake. Yup, I got airsick. Stupid turbulence. The little old lady next to me gave me a tissue and was pretty nice. It's probably quite awkward sitting next to someone who's barfing their guts out. Then after that it took forever to get my luggage. I'm just glad I got it in the end. Losing luggage is not fun. So, my travel experience definitely wasn't the greatest.

Jamie picked me up from the airport and we promptly got stuck in Salt Lake City evening traffic. It was like 5:30. So then I was hungry, cause I didn't have food in my stomach anymore (on account of my lunch being in a barf bag inside a trash can). So we went to Wendy's. I got a chicken salad sandwich thing and it was pretty good. I'd get it again.

We made it down to Provo eventually and back to the apartment (Oh, how I adore my apartment! It's so pretty!) then I went to get my stuff from the friends who were storing it. That was fun cause I got to meet Jamie's friend Merril (not sure how he spells it). He turned out to be a pretty fun guy and he helped us move all my stuff. There's nothing like having a guy to carry heavy things for you. Anyways, after Lindsay came home, we decided to go miniature golfing. Now, I'd never been mini-golfing before, so I wasn't that great, but I think I did decent enough for my very first time. I made a 68. I had some really great putts, too. But then I had really bad putts to make up for the good ones.

Yesterday was fun, too. Jamie and I went grocery shopping. I bought lots of food, including nectarines and almonds. Yummy! I just had one of those nectarines and it was soooo good. That night, Lindsay decided we were going to have a bonfire and roast marshmallows and stuff. So we got a group of people and went up into Provo Canyon and made a fire. We were there about an hour and then we got kicked out by this ranger policeman guy. He was actually pretty nice. He told us that open fires weren't allowed and that there was a $178 fine, but he wasn't going to make us pay. Apparently, this rule has only been around for the last couple weeks. So, we put out the fire and some of us headed back to our apartment to play some DDR. That was fun, especially when Jessica and Scott did a round together. They are soooo funny and such a cute little married couple!

Today, Lindsay and Jamie and I went to church, of course. Due to it being summertime, we were combined with two other wards. Sacrament meeting was very good; one guy talked about setting goals, a girl talked about loving others, and the last speaker, um, well, I can't remember what he talked about. The Sunday School lesson was about Job, and in Relief Society we had a nice discussion about agency. That's pretty much it.

Wow, so this post is way longer than usual. That's probably because more stuff happened then has happened in awhile.

Voter

Today I voted! I was a part of the political process, I did my civic duty, and all that stuff. Pretty cool, huh? Especially since I got a sticker!

And I got my hair cut! This day has been pretty exciting, and it's only 1:00. I still am going to hang out with my friend, Melissa, tonight, so I feel very busy today. Ok, well, busy compared to the rest of my summer day.

Taste

Time for another post!

So Friday was my Grandpa Lavers' birthday and we took him out to eat. This restaraunt was called Bonefish Grill (obviously a seafood place) and I am not the biggest fan of seafood. Fortunately, there were non-seafood items on the menu. I got the chicken marsala, which turned out to be very very excellent. I even ate all of the mushrooms. Now there was a time when the very thought of mushrooms grossed me out, but apparently my tastes have matured. Now I can eat them (though not just by themselves) and I enjoy the flavor they add. Maybe this means that someday I'll be able to like seafood, too.

Leisure

In an effort to keep my brother-in-law appeased, I have posted again. Good for me.

So I'm going back to Utah in like, a week. Definitely having mixed feelings about that. However, there is one thing I've learned this summer. It is far far better to have stuff to do (like a job, or classes, or something) than to live a life of leisure.

Of course, it's nice to have a whole day of nothing to do every once in a while. But to spend every single day like that is not nearly as much fun as it may sound. So, I will be very grateful to get back to a place where I have a real life. In fact, I almost wish that I had stayed in Utah these past two months and only come home for just two weeks. Oh well, it's just another week.

Sigh

I'm sorry I haven't been a big poster this summer. I'm pretty much hopeless. Not that many people read my blog anyway. But like I've said before: it's hard to blog when nothing ever happens to me.

At least I've been away from the evil boy disease this summer. Here at home there have been no guys to like, just the memory of that one boy out in Utah. And as nothing could ever possibly happen with him anyway, it's just as well that I've been here in Alabama. I still get kinda sad whenever I see something that reminds me of him, though. Well. I'll be in another ward this fall, and with any luck, there'll be another boy for me to crush on, cause that's pretty much as far as I can get with any boy.

In other news, I've been reading about a new Lord of the Rings RPG coming out next year. The website looks good; I like the artwork. I've seen all the video blogs about the game development, too. It looks pretty cool and I'm looking forward to actually seeing screenshots and whatnot. I've checked out the forum, too. It seems like other people are pretty excited about it and I like that the game developers are asking what the gamers want in the game.

There's one thing that bothers me about forums though. People do not know how to write English! I mean, use a freaking spell check, people! Learn the simple basics of grammar! Begin your sentences with a freaking capital letter! Ok. I feel better now. Every once in a while, that prescriptivist deep down inside of me comes out and I just need to rant about the lack of proper English usage on the Internet.

Ugh.

I suppose I should update again, or Peter might get mad and scold me again. I have such a cruel brother-in-law! Just kidding, Peter!

So, something mildly exciting did happen to me. When I get back to BYU, I'll probably get promoted at my job! Yay! It means a 25 cent raise, too. More money is always good, but there will also be new responsibilities. So, that's good.

There are things I'm looking forward to about going back to Utah, and things I'm not excited about at all. My job, my friends, my swanky apartment. Those are all good, happy things I want to get back to. Mostly it's just more school I'm dreading. I'm tired of it. I've been in school since I was five years old. That's like 16 years. Considering I'm 21 years old, that's a long time. Do I really have to keep going? Will it ever end? Probably not. Ugh.

Word.

Went to Nashville yesterday with my mom and little brother.
Ate a pretty good burger for lunch at a pretty good burger place, Backyard Burger.
Went to a bookstore and bought 3 books - Two for me, one for little bro.
Went to Joanne's and hung around while my big sister and mom picked out stuff for a baby quilt.
Went to Target, looked at video games, walked around with my sister and mom while my sister registered for baby stuff.
Went to PF Chang's for dinner. Had lettuce wraps and beef and broccoli. Excellent.
Went to The Cosmetic Market. Cool store. Mom got almond-flavored stuff and I got some expensive makeup.
Went to a music store. Mom bought a bunch of music including the music book for Wicked. Yay!
Went back to Sis and bro-in-law's apartment. Had ice cream.
Went home.
Josh left his Gameboy at apartment. Turned back and picked it up.
Slept in the car on the way home.
Got home.
Went to bed.

Gaming

Boy, is it hard to blog about stuff when stuff never happens to me.

The most exciting thing I've been doing is playing Star Wars: Knights of the Old Republic 2. Or KOTOR 2 as I like to call it. It's a pretty fun game. I like having a lightsaber and using the force to decimate the evil of the dark side. However, since I played it last summer already, the story and characters aren't new to me. I like playing on the PC better than the Xbox, though. I never could get adapted to those controllers. Too many buttons and no mouse!

The Elder Scrolls: Oblivion is a pretty sweet game that I'm also playing right now. I find it completely hilarious that Patrick Stewart does the voice of Emperor Septim and Sean Bean does the voice for Brother Martin. And it is soooo fun to just run around the world in this game, because it looks so freakin' cool!

The sad thing about all these fun computer games is that they will go away when my little brother heads off to college.

The game that I would love to play right now though isn't out in the US yet. Final Fantasy XII. Ooo, I can't wait to get my hands on that somehow. It's been years in the making and anticipation. But it'll be awhile until I can play it. I don't even know when that'll happen. I don't have a PS2 and I'm not sure I could actually afford the game even if I did have one. I guess I'll just have to be patient. Oh well.

Uplift

So, I pretty much have the best job ever. Even when I'm not even working there right now. You know why? Because I work with hilariously funny people who have this amazing ability to turn my frown upside-down! I was feeling crappy today, but after I read all the posts on Blackboard from the people at work, I felt so much better. It really is the little things that can turn whole universes around. Well, at least my universe.

Parent-less

This morning I sent Dad off to the airport. Looks like we're on our own for a couple weeks. We're not totally without supervision, though, because my aunt Diane is gonna call every once in a while to make sure that we're still alive.

I got on pretty well with the boys today. We went to church and made dinner. Those were pretty much the highlights of the day. For dinner we had some leftover grilled chicked, smashed potatoes, green beans, and rolls. The smashed potatoes and rolls were particularly delicious. Bryan made us make a whole bunch of potatoes, so we have enough for leftovers later.

Dad seemed kinda worried about us last night and this morning. I kept reassuring him, though, that everything would be fine and we wouldn't destroy too much of the house. He did take me aside and tell me what to do in case something happened to him or Mom. I'm sure nothing will happen, but it was scary talking about it all the same. It's not a pleasant thing to think about your parents dying. I'm not nearly mature enough to completely support myself. Thank goodness I have lots of loving family and friends.

Florida

Hey all. I just got back from Florida. We had our biannual Howell Family Reunion down at Ft. Walton Beach. The ocean was beautiful and it was a blast to see all of my relatives (at least the ones on my dad's side). I pretty much just sat around all week and only went down to the beach in the evenings. It was hot!

Everyone seemed to have a fun time, which was good. And everyone got to come this time, everyone except my mom, that is. She's in Italy right now. And Dad is flying to France on Sunday to meet her. So for the next two weeks, I'm the mom in the house. Kinda a scary thought, huh?

I'm really excited about going to see Pirates of the Caribbean on July 7th. Yes, I know I'm such a silly fangirl, but I love pirate movies! I think it has something to do with playing The Secret of Monkey Island as a kid. That is pretty much the best computer adventure game ever. In my opinion. "Look, it's a three-headed monkey!" and "I'm selling these fine leather jackets..." and who could forget "You fight like a dairy farmer!" "How appropriate, you fight like a cow"?

Ok, well, I'm running out of things to write about, so I'll just sign off now.

Trip

Since Peter has complained that I haven't made a blog entry for awhile, here's what's been going on lately.

I'm currently at home in Alabama, but that will change on Tuesday when I fly back out to Utah to finish out Spring term. I'm not actually taking any classes. I just work. But my job is the most fabulous job ever! And keeping busy with that most definitely helps distract me from being depressed.

We got Jessica all married off just one week ago in the Washington D.C. temple. It was a beautiful, very long day. I'm really glad I got to be there though. Amazing how all of us roomies were able to come to the wedding!

So after the wedding, I got to fly down to Alabama and totally surprised my dad and my brothers by coming home for the week. Bryan graduated this week and that gave me an excuse to stay out East for a bit, instead of flying straight back to Provo. It's been nice, just taking a little break from work, but I'm getting to the point where I need to have something to do with my time again. I do like playing Oblivion on my brother's new computer though. Fun game! Except when I accidentally killed my horse and pressed the save button instead of the load button. Poor thing! But I'm anxious to get back to Utah and back to work and back to my friends out there.

Moved

Well, I'm all moved into my new fabulous apartment. I feel like a queen in this place! It's so roomy and gorgeous and so not like a dump! However, there are a few things I still need to retrieve from my old place. Good thing Kate and Amanda still live there.

Tonight me and Jamie (Lindsay's cousin who is now one my roommates) are planning on going to Walmart where we will buy some things we need for the apartment and also my medication. Yes, I'm gonna take antidepressants. I'm kinda wary about the side effects, but I've heard that Lexapro, which is what I'll be taking, tends to have less side effects. Well, we'll see what happens.

I'm way excited about my trip in two weeks! I think I want to buy a new outfit for Jessica's wedding, so I'll go on a shopping trip sometime before then. Jennica (a co-worker) and I are going flip-flop shopping tomorrow before our party for work. I really need some flip-flops. They're such a necessity during the summertime and I have only one pair. So I might splurge on a pair of cute ones while getting a pair or two of cheap basic ones. Well, hmmm, I've kinda run out of things to talk about, so I'll sign off now.

Two

Well. I have two things to share. The first is much more pleasant compared to the second, so I'll start with that.

We're throwing a bridal shower for my roommate, Jessica, today. I'm excited but a little sad at the same time. This shower kinda symbolizes the "breakup" of us as roommates. Jess is getting married, Amanda's staying in Liberty Square and then moving to a house in the fall, Kate's graduating. Only Lindsay and I will be living together this spring. I feel like I've lived with these girls forever, and I've felt that way for nearly the entire past two years. But at least this spring it'll be somewhat easy to keep in touch. We'll live pretty close to each other until the end of June. After that, I really hope that we can continue to be such good friends, despite the parting of our ways.

The shower should be pretty fun tonight though. We refused to tell Jessica anything about the plans for the shower. She's kinda stressed out by that and it's pretty funny.

Ok, on to the not pleasant thing.

About three weeks ago, I finally broke down (due to some encouragement from Lindsay) and went to the counseling center to set up an appointment to see a counselor. A week ago today, I went to my appointment. It was an intake appointment, where they just talk to you and figure out how to treat you. Well, the counselor I saw diagnosed me (is diagnosed the right word to use?) with moderate depression. So I'm going to have counseling this spring and this coming Monday, I'm going to see a psychiatrist to maybe prescribe some medication for me.

I feel weird posting this on a blog instead of telling people in person or over the phone or whatnot. But I know that if I tried to tell people those ways, I'd pretty much break into tears and get embarrassingly emotional. It was hard enough just talking about it at my intake interview.

So that's the unpleasant news. I kinda feel relieved. I don't feel like now that I'm gonna see a counselor and take medication that all my problems will just go away; I know that it's most likely gonna get harder now that I have to actually deal with everything instead of just shoving it deeper inside me. But I feel a great sense of relief that I've started something to get help. It's like there's an end in sight finally. Right now it feels an incredible, impossible distance away, but at least I can catch a glimpse of it. And that's a very relieving thought.

Plans

Well, tonight I'm going to Tucano's with Lindsay. It's her birthday on Sunday and she's using her Tucano's buy one dinner get one free gift card. I'm excited about that. So I'll be a carnivore tonight.

Tomorrow night we're having a party for both Lindsay and Jenna (Jenna's birthday is on Saturday). That should be fun. It's also St. Patrick's Day tomorrow, so everyone needs to wear green or they will be pinched!

Saturday, I'm working. And then I'm going to see the new Joseph Smith movie up in Salt Lake. I've heard that it's pretty good. And it's Jenna's birthday!

Sunday, I'll be teaching Relief Society. And it's Lindsay's birthday!

Well, that's pretty much what I'll be doing the next few days. Not too exciting, except for the Tucano's trip.

I wish the semester was done already.

Weekend

This is kinda late for a weekend update, I know.

So, Saturday night we had a ward activity. All the FHE groups have been making music videos and so we had this Grammies night where we all got awards and dressed up and stuff. If I get some pictures from my roommates I'll try to post 'em. We had such a fun time! And after we got back from that, there was a dance in the Liberty Square gym. We went with our FHE brothers and had a blast. They are really fun guys.

Church on Sunday was great, even though I was starving. (I really needed to go grocery shopping cause I was totally out of food.) Later I got both visit taught and home taught. Double whammy. And then I did get something to eat, cause Kate made this yummy chicken pasta stuff.

Monday we had FHE. We went and played Wallyball at the Provo Rec Center. Again, way fun! I love our FHE group. It's small, but tight. And I made some pretty cool plays, at least for me. Then I went to Smith's with Amanda. And bought my much needed groceries.

So that's what's been going on with me.

PS: I just found out that my cousins had their baby! And I got to see pictures! Yay!

Ducks

Since today was absolutely beautiful, Lindsay and I decided to take a stroll to the duck pond on the south of campus. We brought some bread with us, so we could feed the ducks. And we spent about 20 minutes watching the ducks and throwing bread. We even saw some turtles sunning on a log! Lindsay tried to feed them, too, but apparently turtles don't eat bread. She ended up just pelting the bread at their heads, hitting right on several times.

Ducks are really funny animals. We chased them into the water, which was amusing and then watched as this one male started nipping this other one's tail and they totally started dukeing it out. Or maybe I should say "ducking" it out. Ha ha. Anyways. It was fun and it's warm outside. Winter seems to have just breezed by, though I have no doubts that we still have some chilly weather in store for Provo.

DDR

Yesterday, I was planning on just hanging around my apartment, playing my computer, watching some movies. But several things happened yesterday to change those plans.

First, I got a new roommate. My days of having my own room are over! I'm somewhat sad because of that, cause now Jenna won't be able to sleep over whenever, and I have to get used to sharing a room again. It'll take a bit of adjusting, but it looks like Chelsea is a really nice girl that I'll be able to get on with. She was in the room all day, unpacking her stuff, so that kinda upset my lounging around plans.

Second, Jamie(Lindsay's cousin) called me and told me she wanted to go buy Dance Dance Revolution and asked if I would come with her. I had some things I wanted to pick up at the store, so I agreed. So we drove to Best Buy and bought the PS2 there. They had the game, but they didn't have the dance pads there, so we drove over to the mall to Gamestop where they had the dance pads for 20 bucks. However, Gamestop didn't have the game! So we drove over to Toys'r'us, but they didn't have it either. Our next stop, Circuit City, didn't have it either, so we finally went to Walmart, where we both needed to go shopping anyways. Walmart didn't even carry DDR, so we bought our groceries and then went back to Best Buy and just got the game there. After that fun adventure quest, we went to Jamie's apartment where we proceeded to play DDR for the next 3 and a half hours! That game is incredibly addicting and fun! The only reason we stopped was because our legs hurt so much. But I've gotten pretty dang good at the Beginner level and I can hold my own on the Light level. I wanna keep playing it because it's a video game that's fun and good for me!

The only other news I have is that I'm sick with the flu. It's not fun, but surprisingly, I was doing fine with DDR yesterday. I got kinda winded when I first started playing, but that passed. I don't think having the front door open with a fan blowing cold air everywhere did much good for me though. It was nice cause we were getting all sweaty, but when I woke up this morning, I felt so much worse than I did yesterday. Blegh.

Update!

So no one except for Peter has updated their blog for awhile. Let me tell you people, it makes for boring reading. I want to be entertained, people, and I want to be entertained now! Ok, not really. But I do like reading my family's various blogs. And my own life is pretty boring right now. I just go to school, go to work, come home, sleep occasionally. At least we have a three-day weekend coming and I don't have to work on Monday. Vacation day! I get to sleep in and I'm really excited about that! I only get to sleep in on Saturday and most of the time not even then cause my roomies are up and about and being loud.

Scripture of the day:
D&C 98:12
For he will give unto the faithful line upon line, precept upon precept; and I will try you and prove you herewith.

I've decided that this scripture applies to me and boys right now. I guess I'm kinda impatient for a relationship. But I can't have one all at once. I have to get one "line upon line", a little at a time. So I'll try to work on being patient and just taking one day at a time right now.

V-day

I read a really funny history book by Dave Barry today during my break. I got out of my Latin class, pleased with myself for getting another 99 on a test, headed over to the library, my second home, and read for almost 2 hours (after I did my homework for Geography). Then I finished the book and turned it into the security desk on my way out of the library when it was time for class.

In Geography, we talked about hurricanes and El Nino. This wasn't nearly as exciting as last week, when we talked about tornadoes and got to watch the last 10 minutes of Twister. I love that movie! Today I spent the whole time thinking first about the grade I got on the Geography test (which wasn't nearly as good as my Latin test grade) and the movie The Day After Tomorrow. I wish we could have watched that movie. Especially the part where they burn law books in the NYC library. I think that was the thing I liked most about that whole movie. The being trapped in a library part. And, of course, I'd giggle horrendously whenever Ian Holms came on the screen because, hey! He's Bilbo Baggins! Well, I have D&C in a few minutes, so I guess I better end this.















Don't you just love how my post title has nothing to do with what I actually wrote? Except for the "day" part.

Jenna

So I was talking with my step-adopted-half roommate, Jenna, last night. I really like her. She's Canadian. Of course, her being Canadian really has nothing to do with why I like her. She's really easy to get along with, she's funny, and she and I both have boy problems. I really really wish that she was actually living with us right now, but I'm looking forward to next fall when she'll be my real roommate. I like how I find it easy to talk to her about anything. She doesn't make me feel awkward. She listens to me and doesn't make me feel like I'm an idiot even when I'm struggling to find the right words to say.

Now if I could only find a boy that I could connect with like that. Right now, that seems pretty hopeless.

Tittle

As in jot and tittle. Cause I have just a few minutes to update until I have class.

Life has just kinda been droning on lately. Nothing exciting. The highlight of my week was when I went to see the gorgeous apartment that I'm moving into for spring. It is the most beautiful apartment in the world. I was talking about it at work yesterday and one of my co-workers commented that I talked about that apartment with more enthusiasm than I ever talked about a boy. Sad, huh? Maybe because I've never had anything exciting to say about boys. Because they never give me anything exciting to talk about. I guess that's half my fault. You reap what you sow, and I have a bad habit of keeping my seeds to myself.

Sleepover

I just got back from a night of raucous fun with my ward's Relief Society at a sleepover that took place at our Bishop's house. Ok, well, it wasn't really raucous. I just wanted to use that word. But it was fun. I mean, about 50 girls had free reign of the Bishop's huge house. My roomie Amanda was so amazed that he actually trusted us so much. No one was there but us girls. I think that such an event would never happen at any other college in this country without some serious, heavy partying going on. And lots of other stuff. Apparently the girls I go to church with are very mature. Or at the least we're not stupid.

Yesterday, I felt so cool. Latro talked to me after my Semantics class. Wow, I got to talk with one of my favorite Board writers. Not that he writes much now. But it was still cool. Dude, I don't even write for the Board, but I still feel prestigious and somewhat omniscient. Cause I have connections.

Sundance

This past Saturday, I went to the Sundance Film Festival in Park City with my roommates. We drove up about noon and the snow-covered mountains were incredibly gorgeous. When we got to Park City, we were lucky enough to get some pretty decent parking. So we trudged over to Main Street and walked up and down the rest of the day. It snowed all day long and got pretty cold near the end so we took the free shuttle bus back to the resort where we had parked. We got loads of free stuff; that made the trip totally worth it. And we saw Nick Nolte and the guy from the 40-Year Old Virgin. Amanda chatted up a couple of security guys and gave them her number, saying they should call if they were going to any cool parties that night. They did call later, inviting her to a party where Sting would be, but Amanda was unavailable and she deleted the message from her phone after copying their number down wrong. I'm not sure she should have gone even if it had worked out.

Tomorrow is my roommate Kate's birthday. I got her something today but I still have to find some way to wrap it. Well, I think I have some birthday bags.



Here's us in Park City: in the back from the left there's Amanda, Jenna, and me, in the front from the left there's Lindsay and Kate.



And us in front of the theater. We didn't actually go see any movies or anything, just walked around.

4X

Mom said I have to do this blog thingie, but I won't tag anyone at the end of mine to make them do it.

Four jobs you have had in your life:

1. Babysitter
2. Stained Glass Window shop assistant
3. YMCA child care provider
4. Desk clerk at the BYU library

Four movies you would watch over and over:

1. Lord of the Rings
2. Emma
3. Pirates of the Caribbean
4. The Chronicles of Narnia

Four places you have lived:

1. Huntsville, AL
2. Provo, UT
3. I've lived in 2 houses and one apartment in Huntsville. Does that count?
4. I've also lived on campus and off campus in Provo. They should really count as two completely different places.

Four TV shows you love to watch:

1. The OC
2. CSI:New York
3. Escaflowne
4. Lost (Well, I'd like to watch it.)

Four places you have been on vacation:

1. Scotland
2. London
3. Florida
4. Cedar Point, OH

Four websites I visit daily:

1. Gmail.com
2. The 100 Hour Board
3. Homestarrunner.com (well, almost daily)
4. BYU.edu

Four of my favorite foods:

1. Chocolate
2. Chicken Fettucini Alfredo
3. Fajitas
4. Meatballs

Four places I would rather be right now:

1. Home
2. Scotland
3. Somewhere warm
4. Asleep (I can't say in my bed, because that's where I am right now!)

Birthday

I'm 21 now. And my 21st birthday wasn't too bad. It fell on a Sunday, so it wasn't much of an exciting day. I woke up at 7 in the morning to get ready for church, cause I had to teach a lesson in Relief Society at 9. And when I walked out to the kitchen to eat breakfast, I caught my roomie, Amanda, putting up balloons and streamers. She was mad that I saw before she was done, so I told her that I'd be really surprised later. Church was good. I think that my lesson went well. Actually I only taught half the lesson; we team teach in our ward. After church I opened my presents from home. I got a movie, some CDs, a book, and a journal. When I was opening up the loot, my roommates were sitting around (And Jessica's fiance was there too), so as I opened up the last bag, I pulled out this little travel kit with shampoo and soap and stuff. Then I realized that something else was still in the bag, so I pulled the other thing out. Poor Scott watched in confusion as I held up a bra! We all laughed and then I put the bra back in the bag so he wouldn't feel weird.

After that, I went over to Jamie's apartment for dinner and dessert. (Jamie is my roomie Lindsay's cousin.) We had spaghetti and for dessert, ice cream and this fudge pudding stuff. It was really good. Then we hung out and tried to play snooker on this mini-pool/snooker game that Kate got me. It didn't really work, cause the little table's surface was not flat at all.

Anyways, the rest of the day was pretty uneventful. I did like that I didn't have to go to school the next day though.

And just to add something, I've pretty much given up on a boy ever liking me, especially a boy liking me when I like him. I just don't think I'm a girl that guys are attracted to. I'm not worried about not having a boyfriend or getting married and all that. How could I be when boys don't even like me? And it especially hurts when I know that all my friends are way more attractive than me and not just in looks. People tell me not to worry, that I'm way too young to worry about relationships. I suppose that's all good and well, but it's not that comforting when you can't even start a relationship as a friend with a boy and you really have no idea how to do so.
And on top of that, I'm scared about my roommates, who are my best friends, going off and getting married and leaving me behind. I just wish I could go back to being in the 1st grade, when boys were just people I chased around the playground and I knew that my friends would be there forever.

School

I think I like this whole one-word title thing.

And I also think that school will be ok this year. I've now been to each of my classes, one I've even been to twice. Latin will be much better than last year, because I really like my teacher. Semantics will be awesome because Latro is in my class!!! He doesn't know me or anything, but I know who he is. Kinda creepy, I know. But he was always my favorite male writer on the Board. Geography I'm hoping will be a breeze and D&C shouldn't be bad at all. My teacher for that is Bro. Mineer. He's this adorable old man who reminds so much of my Grandpa Howell. It's like I'm taking a class from my own grandfather.

Tomorrow is going to be so not that fun. I'm in school or working from 9 to 5. No breaks. I don't even get an hour for lunch! And then tomorrow I'll actually have to do homework. At least I won't have to be on campus for forever like last semester on Mondays. 10 in the morning to 12 midnight. Ugh.

And my imaginary roommate, Heather, moved out. So I might be getting someone else living in my room. Kate's old roommate might move in. Right now, she's actually sleeping here anyway. I don't mind if she does make it permanent. She's been really nice so far; it's just weird actually sleeping in a room with another person. I'll have to get used to it again. Thank goodness she doesn't snore though! I don't want to spend another year always sleeping on the couch. Awww, poor Shannay-nay!

Awake

So I had a break for awhile from my blog. But I think I should start writing again. And there are lots of other things I should start doing too.

Coming back to Provo from Christmas break was like waking up from a dream. The night I got back, I lay on my bed wondering if I had even left Utah. Home is a completely different world and I have to adjust myself into someone else when I go there. I have to be happy there.

I am certainly not a brave person. Sometimes I come across brave people, people who actually look and feel real and who aren't afraid of who they are and of letting someone else know them. And I admire them and want to be like them. But I distance myself from them. Because I'm not that good. I wish I had that special gift with words that some people have. That I could say something, and the words would be perfect. Maybe that's why I hate writing papers and talks and lessons so much. My words are much too incompetent.

I was reading the blog of someone I know and they had written a Christmas list of what they wanted. Many of the things on that list are what I want too. But there was one thing on that list that I have and I'm extremely grateful for that. My job. It may sound silly, but because I have a job, I can wake up in the morning. I have something to occupy my time, something to take pride and joy in. School doesn't do that for me anymore. That's my own fault, I know. But I live for waking up and walking up to that wonderful library. I live for standing at that desk and helping patrons to check out a book, or to find a book. I live for working with some of the most amazing people I've ever met. I live for sitting at the computer in back with a full cart of books rolled up next to me. I live for handling those books, those beautiful bits of an author's soul. When I someday leave BYU and the library behind, my heart will weep to lose something I love so much. And a bit of my heart will stay here, too.

As I read over what I've just written, I realize again how incredibly incompetent a writer I am. My thoughts are so jumbled, so disorganized. I apologize for my lack of skill. And even after writing all this, I still haven't gotten to a point. But I don't think I have one anyway.